So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
