You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize
