It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
