quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
