If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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