try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
