I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
