we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize