I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize
