so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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