You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
