How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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