dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
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