She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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