I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I think my fart just growled at me.
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She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
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Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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