your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
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