better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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