i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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