You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I need water and some morals
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no