Texts From Last Night

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  (513): View more from Ohio

  i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"

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  (513): i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway" http://tfl.nu/kkqr
  Replies (25) Good night (3703) Bad night (654)
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  (520): View more from Arizona

  please come you make the beer taste better

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  (520): please come you make the beer taste better http://tfl.nu/dzlt
  Replies (16) Good night (4798) Bad night (645)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.

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  (248): Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn. http://tfl.nu/n0iu
  Replies (8) Good night (3066) Bad night (718)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?

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  (651): How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out? http://tfl.nu/x0y6
  Replies (22) Good night (5141) Bad night (1630)
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???

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  (702): If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy??? http://tfl.nu/4rkp
  Replies (30) Good night (748) Bad night (4895)
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  (641): View more from Iowa

  Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.

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  (641): Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in. http://tfl.nu/co4b
  Replies (16) Good night (4143) Bad night (1075)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.

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  (617): I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny. http://tfl.nu/fr7i
  Replies (10) Good night (1015) Bad night (2343)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!

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  (518): Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!! http://tfl.nu/blny
  Replies (8) Good night (3477) Bad night (1046)
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  (409): View more from Texas

  he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out

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  (409): he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out http://tfl.nu/o406
  Replies (5) Good night (1096) Bad night (2220)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?

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  (402): Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this? http://tfl.nu/pyyb
  Replies (6) Good night (1626) Bad night (553)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again

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  (509): With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again http://tfl.nu/qu3m
  Replies (3) Good night (787) Bad night (1034)
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  (310): View more from California

  He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.

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  (310): He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom. http://tfl.nu/v9mc
  Replies (2) Good night (867) Bad night (424)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.

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  (708): Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight. http://tfl.nu/8q6s
  Replies (4) Good night (1062) Bad night (540)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.

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  (256): He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree. http://tfl.nu/17st
  Replies (4) Good night (913) Bad night (277)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob

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  (219): Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob http://tfl.nu/14km
  Replies (4) Good night (372) Bad night (306)

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