he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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