hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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