Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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