If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
where are my eyebrows?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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