Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
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So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
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Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.