why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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