She said her name was "party"
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
