How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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