note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
So vagazzling was a success
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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