Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
you traded sex for a burrito?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
