This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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