I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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