I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I've blown a few things in my day
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
