no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
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I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
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I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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