He is such a slut. More and more my type.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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