i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Randomize
