the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
