Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
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