I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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