he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
