He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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