no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
