Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Randomize
