ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
