Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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