So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
