So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Can't talk, ducks in the car
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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