I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
