Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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