Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Your tits are I can't wait for
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
