We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
