I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize