I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
